I happened upon this quote.
"If you don't face up to your fears on your own aord, the Universe will place obstacles in front of you that face you to force them. Life is so much easier if you take the inititive yourself"
Monday, May 14, 2012
One simple word
I've been thinking a lot lately about what is it that drives my most basic functions. Why is it that I procrastinate and desire so much more. Why is it that I sit on the sidelines and dream of the life I want to living. I look at other people and envy their vitatlity and their apparent comfort with themselves. I envy their stamina, their creativity, their lives.
I appreciate that my life is so much better than a mere 3 years ago when I was so alone and so afraid and living in near poverty and wondering if my life was ever going to get any better. It did. And so much so. I remember looking in the mirror one morning and realising that I was in fact pretty. I stared at myself for several moments and not once did I focus on my blemishes, my weight, my untameable hair. That was a completely foreign feeling for me.
It wasn't long after that when I met Keith. Keith who with his gignatic heart immediatly saw the light in me that I had struggled to find since the end of my first marriage. In seeing it for myself first, I was able to show it to others. I must have been oozing with self confidence at that time. Life became a catalyst to light and love and within a mere few months I was pregnant with my first son, married and signing the documents to purchase our first home. My own family has always been my one big dream to bring alive.
I think it's human nature to always want more than you have.
One always seems to be looking for something to fill a void and even with my wonderful family, I still find myself yearning for more from my life.
With writing my morning pages, I've discovered that one of the biggest enemies of my self worth and creative life is two simple tiny words.
"IF only.... "
I appreciate that my life is so much better than a mere 3 years ago when I was so alone and so afraid and living in near poverty and wondering if my life was ever going to get any better. It did. And so much so. I remember looking in the mirror one morning and realising that I was in fact pretty. I stared at myself for several moments and not once did I focus on my blemishes, my weight, my untameable hair. That was a completely foreign feeling for me.
It wasn't long after that when I met Keith. Keith who with his gignatic heart immediatly saw the light in me that I had struggled to find since the end of my first marriage. In seeing it for myself first, I was able to show it to others. I must have been oozing with self confidence at that time. Life became a catalyst to light and love and within a mere few months I was pregnant with my first son, married and signing the documents to purchase our first home. My own family has always been my one big dream to bring alive.
I think it's human nature to always want more than you have.
One always seems to be looking for something to fill a void and even with my wonderful family, I still find myself yearning for more from my life.
With writing my morning pages, I've discovered that one of the biggest enemies of my self worth and creative life is two simple tiny words.
"IF only.... "
Thursday, May 10, 2012
The Artist's Way
Hello!
My name is Karen and I am a serial procrastinator who desires to be so much more. Some might even call me lazy when it comes to looking out for myself. Several years ago I was introdced to Julia Cameon's The Artist Way and it changed the course of my life for the better. I was able to build the courage to leave a bad marriage and start things anew. I gave up the security of a high paying job to follow my childhood dream of being a librarian and I overcome my struggle with self confidence (temporarily at least)
Fast forward a few years and I am now happily married with two beautiful children and a group of mothers who have become like sisters, even though we have never actually met one another in person. One of these mothers, Annie, is one of the most beautiful writers and souls I have had the firtune to meet. We have shared the same struggles and I feel this tremendous connection to her. She has found herself in a slump with her writing. You see, she believes she can only write about suffering. Yet she has been blessed with this amazing little girl who is about to 7 months old and is happier than she has ever been. Yes, she still struggles but she is happy.
Immediatly The Artist's Way came to mind and I sent her a copy of the book and I eagerly agreed to join her in the 12 week course. That was the easy part. I admit I'm a little scared to open those doors again, even though I know only good things will come from it. Having to commit to finding time for myself when I make every excuse not to. Having to be open with my feelings when I try to hide them from the world. Having to commit to walking when my body has become too tired to do much more than it already does. Having to turn up at a blank page and create something from nothing. Having to commit to three pages of long hand writing when I'm afraid of what is going to flow through my pen. I already know where this is going to lead.. It's going to force me to make healthier choices in my life. Catapualt me from my routine and stuck-ness into a rich flow of creative juice.
But then I find myself thinking that those are all great sacifices to make if my two boys have a mom who is healthier both in body and soul. It's all worth it to see my great friend find that she can write sunshine and vibrance. This woman is raw talent at it's best and I can't wait to see what things she can do.
So look forward to more from me over the coming weeks. Share in our journey.
My name is Karen and I am a serial procrastinator who desires to be so much more. Some might even call me lazy when it comes to looking out for myself. Several years ago I was introdced to Julia Cameon's The Artist Way and it changed the course of my life for the better. I was able to build the courage to leave a bad marriage and start things anew. I gave up the security of a high paying job to follow my childhood dream of being a librarian and I overcome my struggle with self confidence (temporarily at least)
Fast forward a few years and I am now happily married with two beautiful children and a group of mothers who have become like sisters, even though we have never actually met one another in person. One of these mothers, Annie, is one of the most beautiful writers and souls I have had the firtune to meet. We have shared the same struggles and I feel this tremendous connection to her. She has found herself in a slump with her writing. You see, she believes she can only write about suffering. Yet she has been blessed with this amazing little girl who is about to 7 months old and is happier than she has ever been. Yes, she still struggles but she is happy.
Immediatly The Artist's Way came to mind and I sent her a copy of the book and I eagerly agreed to join her in the 12 week course. That was the easy part. I admit I'm a little scared to open those doors again, even though I know only good things will come from it. Having to commit to finding time for myself when I make every excuse not to. Having to be open with my feelings when I try to hide them from the world. Having to commit to walking when my body has become too tired to do much more than it already does. Having to turn up at a blank page and create something from nothing. Having to commit to three pages of long hand writing when I'm afraid of what is going to flow through my pen. I already know where this is going to lead.. It's going to force me to make healthier choices in my life. Catapualt me from my routine and stuck-ness into a rich flow of creative juice.
But then I find myself thinking that those are all great sacifices to make if my two boys have a mom who is healthier both in body and soul. It's all worth it to see my great friend find that she can write sunshine and vibrance. This woman is raw talent at it's best and I can't wait to see what things she can do.
So look forward to more from me over the coming weeks. Share in our journey.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)